The Marlins Have a Stadium

What topic could be more fitting for an opening piece than the Marlins getting a stadium, an odyssey that lasted only 15 years (take that Ulysses!).

And yet in spite of all the waiting and deliberating, the Marlins - in typical fashion - have still managed to offend much of what was left of their fanbase. Here's a short list of the complaints:

1. Dade County and Miami shouldn't be bailing out cheap owners with a ridiculous payoff on the stadium.

How does one argue against that? You really can't, but faced with the possibility of our beloved Marlins leaving (look at Seattle), I can't help but cheer. Exploitation of resources for public works isn't a new concept, and if Miami wouldn't have built it, someone else would have (see San Antonio, Las Vegas). Let's rejoice that we still have a team!

2. It's a bad area.

True, but it's not as if they'll be checking weapons at the gate (shotgun, #31...pick it up after the game). Besides, if Miami has any competence, they'll be cleaning up the area by 2011 (maybe I'm giving them too much credit). Either way, this situation is salvageable.

3. The traffic will be a nightmare.

Um...I don't really have an answer for this one. Anyone who's traveled US-1 during rush hour knows how sluggish things can get, and I can't imagine ballgame traffic helping. Let's hope for good public transportation.

4. There won't be any parking.

That's if you ever get to the stadium. All joking aside, the traffic and parking quandary is so obviously untenuous that there has to be a new plan. Think of this on the bright side; if traffic and parking were only anticipated as slight problems, little action would be taken. The problems are so blatant that we'll get something major.

5. The team won't make money anyway.

Ahah! That's where you come in, and let's really prove those naysayers wrong. I'll see you all at the game!